March 24th marked my twenty eighth year here on this earth, and it marked an
important day in my life, as I decided to actually go to work. For anyone who
knows me and how I view birthdays, this is a huge occurrence…even though I took
off the next day. Turning 28 is an unrecognized milestone in a person’s life, as it is the midpoint of what I
call the “career decade” aka “10 Years an Irrelevant Person” (After 12 Years a Slave, any topic revolving
time should be spoken as such). The period between ages 23-33 is a moment where
you are no longer viewed as a darling, or important for that matter, unless you
catapult to the top of your desired career field or on the fast track towards
it. If you deviate from this at any time, you slowly move out of sight and out
of mind, barring life changing events such as marriage or children; coincidentally,
these events shift the focus away from you. In my individual period, I’ve
experienced a sample of these highs and lows, falling out of favor for leaving
the corporate job to pursue a career more to my liking, while being celebrated
for finding new love with potential…that sounds like a 90s R&B group. This and
other forms of exposure afforded by reaching this age has allowed me to have a
better understanding of who I am, where I came from, and where I’m going. It
was important to share this with those of you who took the time to send me best
wishes on my day, so in addition to attempting to thank EVERYONE who said Happy B-Day, I wanted to breaking down 28 using some of my favorite pop culture references.
“And we’re the three best friends
that anyone could have…”- The Hangover
 |
| The crew, known in households as "Y.Me". |
I was
informed that I met my best friends, known to Cheyney University, friends, and
followers as “Y.Me” 10 short years
ago. How time flies. In this time we’ve gone from geeky music enthusiasts with adoration
for graphic tees to businessmen, music artists, show producers, fitness
trainers, public speakers, fraternity men, and more. Yesterday I received in
the mail my pocket square G.Reid New York, a fledgling men’s clothing line but
more importantly my comrade’s business. Garvin, Devyn, Ray, Jeff, and Rob Lay
are not only my friends, but sources of inspiration and standards of
excellence. Mom and Dad always told me you are the company you keep, and I am
proud of the intelligent people I call my brothers.
“You Might See Me In The Streets, But
Homie You Don’t Know Me”- Rapper T.I.
Macedonia
Baptist Church pastor Rev. Keith A Marshall addressed his congregation this
past Sunday with a moving sermon titled “Surviving a Fall”. In his address, he
outlined the importance of the response to
our theoretical fall, stating that we must determine how we identify with our
pain and ability to move forward. Others, he said, will assess your
capabilities and reach a conclusion on what you can do, but he warned, “Do not
allow those who stand at a distance make a determination of who you are.” Oft
times, people who are not in the battle with you, not familiar with your
resolve or faith, unaware of your full personality or mannerisms like to tell
you who YOU are. Half the time, we’re still figuring out who we are; if we don’t
know, how can they? Listen and consider all counsel and criticism with care;
but don’t jump off the bridge because somebody said you can’t make it.
“Either They Don’t Know, Don’t Show,
or Don’t Care about What’s Going on in the Hood”- Ice Cube, Boyz N The Hood
 |
| In Boyz N The Hood, "Cube" dropped a jewel that served more purpose than most imagined. |
The famous quote from one of the great urban movies of the early 90s is meant to highlight the lack of media coverage on impoverishment and violence in urban neighborhoods, but takes on a new, deeper meaning as we mature and experience more fulfilling relationships. In the realm of adult interaction, communication stands tall as one of the most important elements of a successful relationship (no matter the type of relationship). An equally valuable quality is the understanding that communication is not easy and that some people are not built for it, categorized by the same three qualities Ice Cube offered us 23 years ago. When issues arise in friendships and relationships, it is common that one or both of the parties:
“Don’t know”
(have difficulty expressing their feelings);
“Don’t show”
(refuse to offer their feelings) or;
“Don’t care”
(Are indifferent to how you feel about it)
Arguments in
passionate relationships will occur, and experiences determine how
communication plays a role in our lives. As a result, to maintain positive
relationships, consider which of these three stances are acceptable to. I
determined not knowing and not showing are problems that possess solutions; not
necessarily easy, but solutions nonetheless. Not caring, however, is a stance
that doesn’t offer the opportunity for growth and progress, two things that are
truly important to me. From boss to
barber, work to gain a fair assessment
of a person and adjust accordingly.
Ceddy P
Thanks to
everybody who wished me a happy birthday; find your name!
Mom, Dad, Sister Dee, Malcolm, Chi-Town, Cameron, Dev, G,
Jeff, Ray, Des, Abby, Ade, Tyese, Alex Brown, Alex M., Algernon, Big
Momma, Chris, Sam (Blegh!), Keith K, Andrea
D, Andrea T, Charlie V, Arvetta, Andrias, Ant Abney, Antoine Hawkins, Archie, Aunt
Tracy, Bandman, Big Pat McNeil,
Cam, Chaka (Khan), Cousin Nikki, Craig,
Crystal (Crack/Numba), Mr. Word, Cyril, Danielle Speed, Daren, Daryl Northern, Cousin Derrick, Mr.
Tiller, Grant Kamins (Cayman Islands), India (Twin), Jamar, JB, Jennel, Joe Paravecchia, Justin Johnson, Kai
W, Keem (Pam), Kelvin Quick, Kenyon Black, Sprat, Kim W, Kwanzaa (Ms.)Parker,
Kyle, Kyrus Westcott, La La, Lamonte P,
Tasha, Laura (Still call ya Ms.) Rockwell, Lauren Carlisle, LS, Marita, Michael
Yancey, Mike Gabriele, Taya, Nick Marvin, Nikki (I’m coming for you on the
fitness chart!), Noel T, Omenihu A, Rhonda T, Sasha, Shamaya Perry, Cousin
Sharnte, Shay Shay, Sherita Seawright, Steff, Tanee S, Riq, Tiffany B, Tiona J,
Vic K, Whitney J, Yasmeen, Youlisha
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