(Continued from Part 1)
While there are indeed brothers who...just like it bright, many Black men are truly enamored with God greatest creation, the black woman. So why is there such a disconnect between us and our counterparts? At times, both sides play into the stereotypes. For men, we generalize Black women into two categories, the "independent woman" and the "groupie" aka "Future VH1 Reality Star". In regards to the independent woman, fellas, we've been spoiled. Not necessarily you, the actual reader, but us as a faction! In previous generations, many women of color played a secondary role to their mate, appearing passive, submissive, and any other "ives" you can think of. In this time of the "Independent Woman", you would be hard pressed to find a Black female in this era who is willing to downplay her talents, abilities, and her feelings. This is not a trait so common in other races. The minority female has overcome many struggles in her day, and has concluded that it is unnecessary for her to be a doormat to any man.
I ask my brothers, is that really an issue? In my years, brothers have misunderstood this as being loud and selfish, but that's not necessarily the case. The behavior of the modern black female is actually very comparable to the black athlete: many (not all) are intent on showing the fruits of their labor due to years of having nothing. At times it comes off as being flashy and a show-off, but it is a reaction to a period of pain. The same is for the black female. Sisters are now doing for themselves, are proud of it, and should be. Just like the athlete's issues with fame, it takes time to totally control the responsibility of being independent and mesh that lifestyle with a partner. When ready, they fully invest themselves into their careers, families, and love lives.
While there are indeed brothers who...just like it bright, many Black men are truly enamored with God greatest creation, the black woman. So why is there such a disconnect between us and our counterparts? At times, both sides play into the stereotypes. For men, we generalize Black women into two categories, the "independent woman" and the "groupie" aka "Future VH1 Reality Star". In regards to the independent woman, fellas, we've been spoiled. Not necessarily you, the actual reader, but us as a faction! In previous generations, many women of color played a secondary role to their mate, appearing passive, submissive, and any other "ives" you can think of. In this time of the "Independent Woman", you would be hard pressed to find a Black female in this era who is willing to downplay her talents, abilities, and her feelings. This is not a trait so common in other races. The minority female has overcome many struggles in her day, and has concluded that it is unnecessary for her to be a doormat to any man.
![]() |
You'll laugh goofily just like Boris when you find your strong Black sister. |
Many Black men also fear the dreaded "groupie". The sister that had NO interest in you when you were going thru your trials and tribulations to reach success. Back then she didn't want you, now you hot she "all on you" (I SAID...sorry, Mike Jones flashback.) Yes, there are corny sisters like this out there. I already made my list on who's getting face mugged when We're Just Talking reaches cable. We as men however must be smart enough to separate the few bad apples from the SMORGASBORD of GOOD African-American women. Just as we hate to be judged by the last buster's mistakes, we cannot repeat this behavior.
In closing, I reach out to my ladies. Though you have been scorned, we ask that you also do not judge us by our contemporaries. Each male is a new experience. Ladies, I can hear you now: "Boy bye; I treat every man different." Umm yeah...about that. There are men, BLACK men who wish to develop a deep relationship with you. When that opportunity is not offered, people keep it moving, and some brothers are moving it all the way to Becky's house! Be careful of this witchhunt for Black men with "Jungle Fever", because at times it's contracted from heartbreak. I have a co-worker who loves to tease me about what my beau will look like when I hit the red carpet. She says, "Ced is going to be over there cheesing...with a snowflake," and holds up a piece of printer paper (Sometimes she's nice, and holds up a post-it note for more ethnicity.) While she's my homie, and can get away with it, a lot of girls think this about successful men. My question is, we're here...so are y'all ready to put this fable to rest? If so, get down girl, go head, get down...
In closing, I reach out to my ladies. Though you have been scorned, we ask that you also do not judge us by our contemporaries. Each male is a new experience. Ladies, I can hear you now: "Boy bye; I treat every man different." Umm yeah...about that. There are men, BLACK men who wish to develop a deep relationship with you. When that opportunity is not offered, people keep it moving, and some brothers are moving it all the way to Becky's house! Be careful of this witchhunt for Black men with "Jungle Fever", because at times it's contracted from heartbreak. I have a co-worker who loves to tease me about what my beau will look like when I hit the red carpet. She says, "Ced is going to be over there cheesing...with a snowflake," and holds up a piece of printer paper (Sometimes she's nice, and holds up a post-it note for more ethnicity.) While she's my homie, and can get away with it, a lot of girls think this about successful men. My question is, we're here...so are y'all ready to put this fable to rest? If so, get down girl, go head, get down...
Great read!!!!
ReplyDeleteAP ;)
Digging the blog as always bro. I don't necessarily see dating Spanish women as the same as dating a white women though.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Broseph. While I agree that dating spanish women is considered a...more tolerable alternative, the title "She's 1/8 Spanish" is a reference to the claim made when dating a white woman. By stating the white woman is part hispanic, it alleviates tension with nearby sisters. Or so I'm told!
DeleteI love it, especially the comparison of Black women to athletes. In the words of C.Perry "Well played"! Looking forward to the next topic.
ReplyDelete